We hear it so very often, adults with ADHD truly struggling with things that may seem so basic to many; here are just a few of the typical things we hear:
- I can’t get to work on time, I am always 15 minutes late
- When a new process is implemented it takes me FOREVER to really remember it
- Details drive me crazy
- My boss or co-workers always cut me off when I am trying to explain myself
- I constantly turn in projects late
- I feel overwhelmed when people ask me to do things that are not typically part of my day
- It is hard for me to have true friends at work
- I don’t feel like I belong
- People judge me for not being as quick to finish as others
Many of these are excuses, some truly are valid concerns, but many MUST be addressed and rectified IMMEDIATELY!
- Focus on your work not the social aspect: trust me, if you are a successful individual contributor you will eventually be asked to participate in a social conversation, coffee gathering or to order lunch with the group. I know this is difficult but lean on your social friends and network for support not your work colleagues.
- Not a lot of friends who understand you? Join an ADHD meet up group in your area, if there isn’t one try and start one. BUT … this is a big BUT – you must focus on solutions, not the problems and that is how true support and growth are fostered.
- Let me reiterate, Focus on Solutions not problems in all areas of your life. Can’t get to work on time? Don’t blame your ADHD, set rules and goals for yourself with consequences. Example: if you make it to work on time for 30 days in a row… yes 30 days in a row (no excuses) then you can go out to the movies with your friends. If not, well then no outings.
- Hold yourself accountable and let one person who you trust and respect know what your goals are.
- Don’t take on the world or overcommit: set 1-2 goals at a time and make them short enough in time that you can be proud of your results (we aren’t trying to lose 20lbs in a month or a week – think 2 lbs in a month –
SERIOUSLY short, successful, attainable, and sustainable! This should be your mantra!